THE HEGELIAN DISPATCH
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The Snail That Launched a Thousand Ships
The Phoenicians’ Purple Pipe Dream That Built an Empire then Broke It
Jul 1
•
Aly Salem
14
2
May 2025
Did the Younger Dryas Yeet Our Ancestors’ Megaliths Into the Sea?
Paleoclimatology and Underwater Archeology Reveal How History is Basically Groundhog Day But Wetter
May 24
•
Aly Salem
17
Myths, Memes, and the Semiotics of Cultural Production
The survival of the wittiest, not the fittest
May 16
•
Aly Salem
17
3
Gilded Youth vs. Jacobins
Or, why revolutions always fail.
May 8
•
Aly Salem
18
4
April 2025
How Many Tariffs Does It Take to Resurrect a Dead Factory in Ohio?
Nixon, Bretton Woods, Fiat Currencies, and the New World Order
Apr 30
•
Aly Salem
21
1
When Jesus Took the Wheel
How Christianity took over the Roman Empire
Apr 22
•
Aly Salem
24
1
Is Civilization Itself a Byproduct of Climate Change?
Göbekli Tepe and the dialectics of climate determinism
Apr 4
•
Aly Salem
18
4
WATCH: The War on Beauty
The Orwellian Glow-Down: When Beauty Became a Sign of Bad Taste
Apr 1
•
Aly Salem
5
1
March 2025
Buttercup the Horsie Goes to the Glue Factory
The circle of capitalist life, from pasture to paste.
Mar 26
•
Aly Salem
12
1
The Mummification of Evita
A Macabre Tale of How a Mummy Turned Peronism into the Proletariat's Gothic Fantasy
Mar 19
•
Aly Salem
7
The Cadaver Synod: The Unhinged Spectacle of Medieval Cancel Culture
What a 9th-century papal necro-trial reveals about our own collective psychosis
Mar 12
•
Aly Salem
11
Why Does Your Brain Want to Throw Tesla's Robot Down a Well?
On ogres, hobbits, trolls, and the ancient lore of Neanderthals getting yeeted from the gene pool.
Mar 5
•
Aly Salem
11
1
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